The
heat outside was scorching and who left the house would for sure have a lowered
focus, unless some people gather extra capacities under such heat. Inside me
there was something going on which is not so similar, but some people find it to
share traits with the heat effect outside, but how can people figure a deep
atmosphere within me which I am not able to grasp fully. Humans like to judge
others, for that allows them to categorize and by that they can follow simple
rules to interact with others. We like to judge but find it unpleasing to be
judged.
There
was something lingering in my subconscious which I couldn’t really understand
or touch. It was in no way concrete. I believe it was an abstract notion which
I am even unable to put it in words. I chose to utter them in a general
seemingly bleak way and see if it could be addressed.
I
greeted her and asked if she could lend me some moments from her precious time,
and she accepted happily. I went on asking “To what extend do you form your own
notions, and compare it to the advises of others”? (I just said others without pointing
to who are these others)
She asked
for further clarification of what I was seeking to know, and it is no wonder
that a person who is serious in answering something wants to understand what is
asked at first. She thought it was a matter of comparison so she chose to get
back to certain basic principles she had and thought that sharing it might help.
“Are you evaluating their advice with your notions?”, she asked and went on “Sometimes
a new advice might clash with your beliefs, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a
good one”. It is clear that people who experienced deep mind altering ideas
that made them change some notions in their lives realize that sometimes their
paradigm might not be the best, even if it suits their lives at that moment. We
hardly find people who openly admit that they might have lacking understanding
on matters, but I think that this state of admission happens ahead of someone
who won’t judge you harshly and would embrace you as you are expressing your
humane perfect imperfection. She continued “So if I think my notions are
narrow, I might widen them, and I really accept advice with a nice embrace, BUT
I don’t act on them hastily”. It is clear that we humans have to form our own
internal schema and we live upon it. At the same time we might accept changes
to come, but no real deep behavioral changes happen abruptly, for everything
needs to sink in along with what we have been experiencing for years. So change
comes slowly for slow change in big matters is what seems effectual.
We
all like to make exceptions on how we take things and it is a normal
functionality of humans who want to have their selves nurtured with some form
of protection. We are not open to every idea very easily, but overtime we form
our own principles in choosing how things should form traffic with our mind.
She added, “I don’t take things so deep especially from strangers who don’t
know my life”. I had to clarify who I meant by others in my question for I
thought that leaving it as it is, she would create a situation for every
person, for people who realize that they carry unique values understand that
people are different. I replied, “Let alone people who don’t know your life,
but I meant experienced people in a certain field, let’s assume in social
issues”.
It
seems that someone can feel that the other might be dragging one to be pushed
to answer in a certain way so she chose to put an equation. She started saying “You
asked me how do I form my notions, okay I form them from a lot of sources, past
+ knowledge + experience + bad events + what’s gonna come in the future” she
added “and if the people are experienced, I might consider their advice seriously,
but I will still follow my intuition and do what I feel is right”.
We
humans form an internal schema and it is what guides us. We give it different
names also dictated by it. This might be a philosophical if something can
define itself but let’s assume here it does to avoid straying from the essence
to be conveyed.
One will feel that a person who is
understanding and passionate to be deserving of love, for that feel will arise
due to your interaction with that person and all that has been between you two
will create an impression upon you, which you will act based on them and that
is part of our intuition. I insisted on knowing to what extent she allows her
feelings to guide her. She replied, “If my emotions don’t align with the
advice, I take longer to process it, especially if the person was rude while
giving the advice, and made me feel like I am a second class person. So it’s
not how much the advice is good, as how the way you convey it”. I couldn’t help
but nod my head agreeing in the greatly put point and the many underlying
lessons in her sentences, but I tried to remove all assumptions of the kind of
the person who might throw a notion into one’s pool of ideas and I said, “Let’s
assume he is a speaker who is speaking to an audience and not to you directly”.
She reiterated the same point made earlier with fine adjustments, “I take it,
but still try to apply it to suit me, for I believe that my life is different,
and I gotta twist it to match my current state. For me, if I hear something
interesting , I would try to really add it to my routine, but still it’s gonna
take time to digest it. I slowly incorporate it within my notions”.
to be continued...
