Suddenly he felt his brain narrowing, he sensed his eyes sinking
in, feeling the tightness at his temples, he rested one hand on the table, and
allowed the other to save his face from falling. Allowing his eyes to glare at
the notes ahead of him, it seemed that reality was not ahead but perception. He
started questioning his perceptions and feeling that he is fooling himself as
he is bending ideas to accommodate with what is within. Perception is formed
within us by taking in information from the external world, but our perceptions
differ and they also differ within us at different times of the day. Our inner
mechanisms allow us to understand what is out there, so it seems that our
perceptions affect our perceiving apparatus and by that when we perceive what
we just perceived after some time, we shall perceive it differently. Apparently we are creators
who create by what is created within us by what we create out there.
He raised his hand from the table sinking his face in his palms and
wondering if he could explain his feelings to anyone, then he heard an internal
shout from within, “we feel alone”. He allowed his thoughts to drag each other
with no direction, and wondered if our language does allow us to express what
is within us or our ability of expression just narrows what is within us and
gives it out blurred and marred. It seems that we are understood by others
through their perceptive tools and their perceptive tools only get what we
could put for them outside ourselves. He realized that these two channels
downgrade what is really felt inside. This realization made his temples throb
and he was feeling the pulsations that made him feel frightened. His anxiety
started to peak and suddenly his leg jerked and by that he hit the stand of the
table. His pain receptors send signals fast to his brain and suddenly the
throbbing was all felt on his right big toe.